Thursday, April 26, 2012

You know you're a parent and an endurance athlete if...

Sleep is a thing of the past.

You rarely see your significant other because when you finish your workout, they're off for theirs.  Someone has to stay with the kids!

You've ever gone to the gym at a certain time so your kids could see thier friends (who were also at the gym at a certain time so they could see their friends).

You've ever asked which stroller has the least rolling resistance.

You've ever chosen a gym based on child care.

You've ever cleaned children's toys out of the bathtub so you can get in, fully clothed, after that long ride or run in the rain.

You've ever hired a babysitter so you can workout.

You've ever fed the kids dinner in their stroller,while you trained.  Or you ran with the stroller over to a local restaurant and picked up food for the kids, then had them eat while you ran back.

You don't buy sippy cups.  The kids get all they need in bottles in the shwag bags from races.

You've ever worn a macaroni necklace during your workout, or anything similar.

The "Mom Song" is one of your favorite workout songs.

You've ever evaluated a bicycle for it's ability to pull a trailer.

Your expensive race bike is stored next a a pink bike with training wheels or a spiderman bike.

Working out IS your quiet time.

You have to check your workout shoes for action figures, toy cars, and barbie accessories.

You look forward to a workout because you might actually get to pee by yourself.

You've ever used the wii fit while holding a newborn.

You finally get out the door for your workout and you realize you're wearing your child's breakfast.

You know exactly how much time you'll get during nap time.

You've ever planned your workout around Spongebob or Sesame Street.

You've ever put the kid(s) to bed late so you don't have to get up as early for the morning workout.

You've ever used the stroller or trailer to get gear somewhere during a workout.  Without kids.

You can expertly combine workout time for you and play time for the kid(s).

You know which trainer to buy to minimize the risk to little fingers.  Or toes.  Or tongues.

You've ever had to explain that, no, an ironman is not Tony Stark.

You've ever put a bike with training wheels on your trainer to appease a kid.

You've ever had to explain that the medal you came home with meant you finished, not that you won.

You've ever had to schedule your races or training around play dates.

You've ever wondered how old the kids have to be before you can start entering them in races.

You've ever run out of people to watch the kids.

You know you can use baby wipes to clean countless workout accessories, and you'll probably still stock the wipes when you no longer need them for the kids.

You've ever stored your workout nutrition in leftover milk storage bags.

You let your kids drink your leftover workout drink so it doesn't get wasted (without caffeine, of course!).

You brag more about your five year old running her first 1k last month than the 5k you just won this morning.

When your child climbs up the bike that you've spent an exhaustive amount of time and money on, and kept it meticulously clean, and all you do is take pictures.

The only thing you eat after a hard workout is whatever is leftover from the kids' breakfast or lunch.

Your two year old son wears a swim cap and your five year old daughter can expertly put it on him, then another on herself.

You've ever used, or considered using a sippy cup for your nutrition needs during racing or training.

You've ever had to skip songs on the mp3 player while you were working out because they were from your kid's playlist.

You note on your workout logs where you had to slow or stop your workout to help your child with homework. (If you use TrainerRoad, you note it in the notes section that your power dropped because you were helping/dealing with a kid.)

You've ever used kids as an excuse to get out of a workout.

You've ever stored any of your workout supplies in a lopsided clay pot.

There are diapers and wipes in your triathlon bag.

You've got to scroll through the cartoons on your dvr to get to the stuff you wanted to watch while you were on your trainer.

You've ever used nipple cream to prevent chafing anywhere.  Including your nipples.

You've ever extensively researched just how much exercise you could do when you were pregnant, then got told you were doing too much. (Moms)

You've ever stood in front of a mirror and lined up "the girls" before walking outside of your bedroom in a tri suit. (Moms)

You've ever run with a jogging stroller, or trailered the kids behind your bike and called it "training."

My favorites:

Your child wants to do a race like mommy or daddy does.

Your child understands the importance of starting and finishing.  And that winning isn't crucial to a good race.

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